Date 06 - Man in Black
The Scene: Car Dealership.
The Attire: Black pencil skirt, a structured suit jacket, and black stilettoes.
The Meeting: Went to have my car serviced and he was the manager on duty.
The Environment: It was hot, my new car was experiencing a glitch, and I wanted to ensure its health.
I immediately thought he was handsome as he stoically walked toward my car. He was helpful, hospitable, and engaging. We conversed, and he connected me with the department I needed and followed back up after my service experience. We chatted for longer than I realized. I shared with him that I was making a mini movie from a planned international trip I had in about a week. He asked if I would share the video with him. I said I would, and we exchanged numbers to make that happen.
He reached out to see if I had made it to my international destination, as well as when I returned home. We chatted here and there, and what I appreciated about this man in black was that he was consistent. I could take his word to the bank, and he was generous with his experiences and his compliments. I liked him. This surprised even me because I am slow to warm up. He was upfront with his interest and wanted to make plans to connect and go out.
With our respective schedules, we finally found a date. I was excited, as I was eager to know if our phone connection would transfer to a face-to-face connection.
On our planned date, I wasn’t feeling well but didn’t want to cancel on him. As usual, I had a full week of travel, so I was exhausted. When you add the illness, I simply felt like a hot mess. I would have normally heard from him early in the day but did not. Against my better judgment, I decided to call.
He answered, “Cherrod, I will call you later.”
Me, “Ok. Bye.”
That call never came.
I go to our designated restaurant, “Superica,” at our designated time, 7:00 pm.
7:00pm He was not there.
7:15pm He had not arrived.
7:30pm Walked the restaurant one last time and departed with fire in my heart.
7:50pm The following text communication …
I mean, seriously!
“I love to be stood up,” said no one ever! I am beyond pissed. I had NEVER in my life been stood up, and my ego was bruised. My heart was racing, and my mind could not compute. My vanity was caught up in the question, what is wrong with this fool?
He called me consistently every day at around 6:00 pm until I finally answered.
Him: “Let me start off by saying I apologize.”
Me: “What happened?”
Him: “So many things, but I can sum it up by saying it was just a fucked up day.”
Me: Silence.
(Self-talk: No accident, no death, no family emergency! It was just a fucked up day. That’s it? Do you know how many of those days will come in a year?”) My head is swarming. Did this joker just tell me this as the reason he did not show up on a date he planned in a location convenient for him and at a time that worked best for his work schedule? I am floored. Man in Black, you cannot be serious. This has me flatlined!
Words began to form, “Man in Black, I am mad, disrespected, and allowed you to make me feel devalued.”
I continued in a balanced tone, “You are not the only one with stuff. I had to sacrifice to get there. I had a full slate of activities and did not feel well. Then you said I could cuss you out. Who do I look like to you? That is immature, and I don’t do that. You and I don’t have the relational equity for me to curse you. I don’t get down like that. Do you have anything else to say to me?”
He said no and apologized again.
I thanked him for calling.
He thanked me for picking up.
I then hung up.
I have gotten a couple of calls and a text here and there since.
Note to Self: When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them.
Shout Out to Men: R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
Question: Why is it so difficult to simply do what you say you are going to do?
