Date 18 - To be or not to be?
The Scene: The lobby of an apartment building.
The Attire: Oversized sweats, a cropped hoodie, and flip flops (I was helping a friend around her place)
The Meeting: Walking the hallway, I spotted a cutie with light eyes and a nice smile. He approached me and asked if perhaps we could hang out sometime.
The Environment: Casual, stress-free, and no work.
After our initial meeting, he was prompt in his communication, thorough in his commitments, and stood by his word. All those things I liked, respected, and appreciated. We hung out like homies, connected like friends, and enjoyed intellectual banter. We had pizza here, movies there, afternoon walks and more. During one of those activity-based engagements, I asked him as I do with all men that I encounter if he had ever been with another man sexually. You may gawk at that, and by all means, feel free, but I have heard too many stories and know too many men who have engaged in the lifestyle of being down low and hide under the premise that “she didn’t ask.”
Well, I am asking. So, when the answer was, “how do you define a man?” the inner Gary Coleman voice exclaimed, “What you talking about, Willis?”
He shared he had been with someone transgender, but he wouldn’t share more. Although he stated that he was an open book, he flat out refused to speak about certain things. To me, that’s the opposite of open and extremely concerning, so I decided to close the door on that man in the building.
The reality of our lives is the truth that we tell ourselves.
Note to Self: Always listen to your inner voice.
Shout Out to Men: Live your truth unabashedly and don’t place unwilling participants into your unsorted arrangements.
Question: Why is living in one’s truth so difficult to do?